The Republican Platform Is A Twisted Economic Fantasy

The Republican Platform Is A Twisted Economic Fantasy

The Republican platform is a mess of dishonest and willfully ignorant politics. Let’s examine the platform’s preamble statement by statement:

1) “Republicans believe in the Great American Dream, with its economics of inclusion, enabling everyone to have a chance to own, invest, build, and prosper. It is the opposite of the policies which, for the last three and a half years, have stifled growth, destroyed jobs, halted investment, created unprecedented uncertainty, and prolonged the worst economic downturn since the Great Depression”

Republicans are the party of economic inclusion…until gays want to buy cakes. Fortunately they make up for this cognitively dissonant hiccup of ideology with their demands that suspected terrorists’ right to buy and sell guns and ammunition is protected.

The RNC’s second sentence is curious given that the Obama has done the complete opposite, except for the uncertainty that many Americans feel about the economy, though this probably comes from Republicans who have spent eight years lying about and even straight up denying America’s Great Recession recovery.

The stock market has never been higher, there has been consistent job growth over an impressive number of months, investment in American firms remains high, exports are up, the auto industry is booming despite Republicans’ earlier efforts to kill it, and no doubt the biggest economic uncertainty over the last eight years comes from Republicans’ own repeated attempts to shut down the government and force the country to the precipice of national default on our debt.

2) “Excessive taxation and regulation impede economic development.”

America ranks very low on the tax scale compared to the rest of the developed world, and out of 34 wealthy nations the US ranks 25.

On a fundamental level, governmental regulations generally protect either the planet or people. Typical governmental intervention functions to protect the environment, food, and the American people as consumers, home-owners, and people who like their water to not catch fire. It’s true that these regulations are very often bad for business, but business is notorious for being very bad for the health of both people and the planet.

However, governmental regulation pays off in the long run as initial economic gains from deregulation typically falter after Americans rich and poor start losing money and/or dying from bad healthcare, fraudulent banking, weak work safety standards, tainted meat, flammable water, unvaccinated children, etc.

Conservatives obscure the reality that passing government regulation is really, really hard. Every governmental regulation has been tirelessly fought for by progressives against the big monied interests that profit from destroying the world and peoples’ lives. Republicans have grown up in a world made so safe and peaceful because of various political battles throughout the 20s, 30s, 40s, and 50s that they do not even understand what kind of libertarian hellhole governmental regulations are saving them from.

3) “Lowering taxes promotes substantial economic growth and reducing regulation encourages business formation and job creation.”

Republicans should call their doctor about their 35-year erection for tax cuts. Obama raised taxes on the rich and we have still seen years and years of straight monthly job growth. Also, the stock market has doubled since he took office.

Kansas passed Republican wet dream taxes and the taxes have nearly turned Kansas into a failed state. But Kansas is not the only state laboratory of proven failed conservative tax policies. Check out Louisiana, too.

4) “Knowing that, a Republican President and Congress will jumpstart an economic renewal that creates opportunity, rewards work and saving, and unleashes the productive genius of the American people.”

How? With magic? There is literally nothing different between Donald Trump saying he will make America great again and a kangaroo standing behind a podium and boastfully claiming it will make America great again. He still has not explained how he is going to do anything. Just like our English-less kangaroo.

5) “Instead, what this Administration has given us is 42 consecutive months of unemployment above 8 percent, the longest period of high unemployment since the Great Depression.”

What a cherry-picked statistic. While technically true, this statistic ignores that President Obama has been in office for 90 months now, and that those 42 consecutive months of high unemployment are arguably the legacy of George W. Bush’s spectacularly terrible last two years as president. Obama ended the streak of high unemployment, and this statement is a fantastic way of hiding the fact that unemployment is currently around 5%, which is well within the 4-6% range that economists classify as “full employment.”

6) “The tax system must be simplified.”

…Said the party that since 2010 has dominated the legislative and judicial branches of government with a sitting President who has publicly shared the same goal and done nothing to advance it with him.

7) “Taxes, by their very nature, reduce a citizen’s freedom…”

Very debatable given that taxes pay for the military, police forces, fire departments, and schools—which fund our freedoms of not being invaded, being robbed, having our houses burned down, and being surrounded by dumb people. Conservatism’s Pavlovian bias against the word “socialism” has really screwed with their understanding of political science.

8) “…Their proper role in a free society should be to fund services that are essential and authorized by the Constitution, such as national security, and the care of those who cannot care for themselves.”

This all sounds like what the overwhelmingly vast majority of our tax money goes to.

9) “Our goal is a tax system that is simple, transparent, flatter, and fair.”

Is it fair if you ask the rich, who have more dollars than they can spend, to pay a proportionately smaller amount of the tax burden than poor people, who have fewer dollars than they need to adequately house, clothe, and feed their children? It is not.

10) “Reform the tax code by reducing marginal tax rates by 20 percent across-the-board in a revenue-neutral manner”

Thinking you can cut your income by 20% and miraculously still have the same income is borderline eating-paint-stupid.

Levi Olson

Levi Olson

Senior political columnist here at Contemptor, and a political scientist proving that American conservatism is a sham. Follow me on Tumblr at or on Facebook & Twitter @theleviolson.