Jeb! Is Running On Bush Dynasty Fumes — Time To Drop Out

Jeb! Is Running On Bush Dynasty Fumes — Time To Drop Out

Jeb Bush clearly should not be running for president. His kinetic energy is powered only by the familial fumes of the exhausted Bush dynasty, and it is painfully evident that Jeb’s Florida governorship was not earned on account of his personal political skill.

Jeb is running an uncommitted imitation of a presidential campaign and is visibly frustrated that the far right’s primary coronation is out of his trust-funded hands’ grasp.

His campaign is charmingly failing to sell the idea that America should return to the W. Bush glory days of 2007, and even though a lot of rich people may have given Jeb money in the race’s beginning it has been spent to show that money is not everything in politics.

To make his case for the presidency, though, Jeb is using the cliché anti-Obama claims that the President is leading from behind, is weak, and so on. But everyone in the Republican field is saying that, and Jeb is hardly a visionary.

Jumping on the war bandwagon, he is calling for a new land war in Iraq against ISIS so that he can be Bush Commander in Iraq the Third. He has to accept the fact that his dad and older brother were presidents, and that he will not be. But that’s okay, because if he somehow was elected president his political awkwardness would be ridiculed like a conspicuously self-conscious seventh grader. Some failures are blessings in disguise.

And besides, Jeb’s charming third Bush war would not work. He could only further tarnish the Bush legacy, which seems determined to invade Iraq every decade or so. A war against Islamic terrorism, such as neoconservative Republicans articulate, simply cannot be won by a shock & awe style occupation. Invasion would merely replace ISIS’ domination with American domination, which would only encourage the terrorists to go on recruiting more terrorists to kill American soldiers now placed directly back in harm’s way continuing the Sisyphean struggle of ineffectively nation-building a culturally-fragmented country that should never have existed in the first place.

It’s time for Jeb Bush to drop out of the race. It’s uncomfortable to watch Jeb uncomfortably pretend to be things he’s not: an ideological partisan, a xenophobe, and, most awkwardly, a presidential candidate. Jeb even still struggles with the simple, obviously coming question of whether or not his brother should have invaded Iraq.

Republican primary voters have moved on, and Jeb is now polling in the low single digits.

Time to move on, too, Jeb.

Levi Olson

Levi Olson

Senior political columnist here at Contemptor, and a political scientist proving that American conservatism is a sham. Follow me on Tumblr at or on Facebook & Twitter @theleviolson.